$17,605.63................

The amount it cost to try and control my Acromegaly every month. One injection. $17,605.63

Never in a million years would I have imagined that a huge 19 gauge needle would be the highlight of my month.It is my medicinal savior. I hate it yet I love it too.It gives me life and takes my life. I hate the thought of having a large needle piercing my flesh every month....having to depend on something so painful to keep me alive.I hate the drive to the next town wondering who will be there this time to inject me. Will she know how to do it or am I going to have to explain for the thousandth time what it is, how it works and how to inject it?Is it going to go in smooth or will I cringe in pain as I feel the alcohol slipping into my new pucture wound? I used to use a cream to numb the skin before injecting but I stopped after a while. I just didn't care any more. No need to numb my skin because I myself had become numb. It was almost as if it was my way of telling Acro to go to hell, I am stronger than you. Nothing you do will break me. I can be stubborn like that sometimes.Even the I.V. nurses argue over who HAS to give me the shot. I actually like it in a sick twisted way.Maybe it is the few moments of sympathy for the girl who gets the 19 gauge needle that no one else gets.I don't know.Just another stupid highlight of my month.

When I first started on injections I was on another med called Octretide which basically does the same thing as the one I have now but with that one, I had to inject myself every eight hours around the clock, 3 times a day. I did that for over a year and I hated every moment of it.That was the first time ever I had to inject myself. It didn't bother me really, but being a cutter a while back, I was experienced in self mutilation....a shot was easy. Oh how I hated having to take the vials with me to inject on time....packing the cooler, gathering the supplies. Seems like my injection time was always at the most inconvenient times. I remember sitting in my car at the park,watching my kids play as I injected. I cried that day.The med had so many side effects. I never felt well...constant diarrhea, swelling, nausea, bloating. I can not remember the amount of times I asked myself if the shots were worth it.A few times,I threw them into the trash. I just could not do it anymore. I was happy actually, when I went in to anaflactic shock from the medicine. My body could not handle it any more. Felt like I was going to die in the ER that day. I couldn't breathe or stop shaking and oddly enough,all I could think of was how relieved I was to have a reason not to keep injecting myself with those damn things.

The injection I am on now, Somatuline Depot, is much easier on my body...very few side effects.But, it also has stopped working or not working hard enough. My IGF-1 levels have begun to rise once again and I am already on the highest dose. Lord help me. This medicine HAS to work for me.

Just a note on the cost of this med. I am so very grateful that my insurances cover the cost of my med but it does make me feel very guilty every time the statements from the hospital come. I can't help but to think of all the other things the government could do with that money.Just another reminder of how this disease causes destruction.

Now,despite the pain and discomfort, I enjoy my Somatuline injection every month. I can feel it everywhere the day the med wears out of my system which is always a few weeks too soon. All the breakthrough symptoms start flooding back into my system and functioning normally is difficult...pain and swelling come back ten-fold.Once I get my injection, I feel better within an hour. Doctors say it is not possible for the med to work that quickly. I ask them "Have you ever had Acromegaly and injected yourself with this med?". I think not. I know my body...maybe it is mental,maybe just the thought of having the med in my system creates the "feel good" until the med does it's job. I don't know really but I do know I feel better soon after and that's good enough for me.

Sending out HUGE hugs and many thanks to all those who are faced with the task of injecting those of us who can not do it ourselves. I appreciate you. I know it is not any easy task to inject someone you love, knowing that it is going to hurt them in the moment and the fact that you do it whether you like it or not shows how much you truly care about us.